Bedroom Talk

How to teach a twin brother that his twin sister is not just a regular girl?

Here is my problem, we have a set of twins boy/girl they are five years of age. Now the problem is our little boy corners his twin sister and wants to give her a kiss or tries hugging way too much what is the best way to correct this? we have them in kindergarten and they play soccer. so they have activities to keep them busy. they do share a bedroom(bunkbeds) because we dont have a large enough apartement and are unable to move. thanks for ya'lls help.

Public Comments

1. they are only 5 year olds ,come on.giving kisses and hug is no big deal.why do u have to think so complicated?
2. Sounds like he's just expressing a bit of love for his sister?? Very normal? And what do you consider"way too much"? He's only 5, so it's not like he would be lusting after her or anything...lol. I'm sure he knows the difference between a "regular" girl and his sister.
3. They are only five. They simply feel that they love eacother, in an appropriate brother/sister way. They are just good friends. Don't say anything about it. He'll grow out of it soon, but If the sister doesn't like it you should atleast tell him to stop and that sissy doesn't like it.
4. Get him interested in OTHER girls... I won't say this is normal or abnormal, harmful or harmless, but I will say that it would be much better if he was doing this to OTHER girls. Also sit down and have a talk with him about forcing his will on others... if somebody doesn't want a hug or a kiss, then it is WRONG for him to hug or kiss them.
5. I think it's pretty common for boys and girls to go through this. In my opinion when you see it happening say "awwww your giving your sister a hug ain't that nice of you" just always keep saying your sister when he gets older he will naturally understand that oh yeah maybe I shouldn't kiss my sister like that and actually it will gross him out later in life lol. He won't be able to get far enough away from his sister. I wouldn't worry at all kids will be kids you can't change them when they are so young on certain things. Good Luck!!!! Things will work themselves out I promise!!!!
6. I don't think It is anything to worry about. He is only 5. My son will be 5 in a few months and kisses his sister all the time! I wouldnt worry. = )
7. I think this will work itself out. In a few years (or even months) he will want to hang with the guys - as my 5 yr old is now doing and he will begin to understand the levels of appropriate displays of affection. Just take lots of pictures and enjoy this time. He sounds like a precious little man.
8. You suspect that there is a physical attraction. You need to find out what the true situation is. Try to indirectly ask him questions that will confirm whether there is a physical attraction. For instance, ask him "Who do you want to marry when you grow up?". If he says his sister, then you need to explain to him that people marry people outside of their families. Also, since he is cornering his sister with affection, you need to talk to him about not giving unwanted affection to people.
9. I have twins also - two boys and they are constantly hugging and kissing each other - when they're not trying to punch or kick each other! TheMy husband was worried about one of our boys who loves to kiss everyone on the lips and a (very wise) friend pointed out that once they go to school and start to experience peer pressure they will very quickly work out what behaviour is considered "acceptable" in our society. Hope this helps, mum2MH
10. Remember that he is only 5, and not 15. At this age, they are not sexually attracted to people yet. Just speak to him about not doing things to people when they don't want you to (if your daughter doesn't want a hug or kiss). Also, DO NOT teach him to do this to "regular" or "other" girls. You don't want to teach him this and have him oversexualized too early. This could cause BIG problems when they start school, and could get him expelled or you in a lawsuit. Accept that he just loves his sister. Unless you have taught him otherwise, he shouldn't know about kissing and touching sexually or out of physical attraction.
11. I think that hugs & kisses between siblings is just fine, unless one of them is uncomfortable with it (or, obviously, if it is sexual in nature). I would find it odd, though, if a 5-yo boy was hugging and kissing on 'regular girls' - girls that were not his sibling. I don't really see why you want them to stop being affectionate with each other.
12. Relax, he's just 5. By the time he's 10 or so, just the thought of kissing or hugging his sister will make him gag. By the way, why would you want to teach your 5-yr-old that it's OK to hug and kiss regular girls (except his sister). Isn't that wrong? Your twins are about the right age when you can teach them the difference between "right touches" and "wrong touches". You can teach them that it's wrong for people to touch parts of their body covered by a swimming costume or their lips. Exceptions are mom and dad helping them wash up or a doctor when mom or dad is present. Likewise, they should not touch others.
13. I don't see a problem here. They're twins, so they'll probably be closer because of that. You don't want to teach him that loving his sister is wrong. Just sit them down and teach them both what "good touch " and "bad touch" is. It's probably a good idea anyway. Does your daughter really seem to dislike the attention?
14. they are 5!! your worrying over nothing!! i think you have a problem with this and not your daughter. has she said anything about it? I can't see anything wrong with a brother giving is sister a hug/kiss. Where's the problem?!
15. It wouldn't matter wether she were a regular girl or not, think about what you would want your 5 year old doing to ANY girl and teach him that is the way to treat girls. They also should not be sharing a room. Twins have a greater bond than any other children would, and you're only making that bond stronger by having them share a room. .. it's especially difficult since they're boy/girl.
16. seems to me he's just a big lover, you wont have many problems with him... unless it still goes on from now until he's 10 then you should check into it...
17. Your son sounds like an innocently affectionate child, but it sounds like his affection is making you project your own issues onto him. Children at that age are very non sexual and their actions are quite innocent. You should really attempt to view the world from your sons innocent point of view instead of treating his affection towards his sister as a predatory sexual behavior.